The Frog Prince.
Posted by Cindy Tey on September 5, 2009
The only thing you can do when you miss somebody who took a part of your life and walked away is to look at his picture.
But doesn’t looking into the eyes of an innocent smiling face you once knew so well makes you wonder how unpredictably scary people can be sometimes? The way they act when they are angry or just don’t give a damn anymore, sometimes they can even make you feel like it’s your fault. But is it?
There is someone for everybody out there, I agree. As simple as it sounds, there is a trick. You’ll never know which is The Someone. Grab him at the wrong time, slide the ring through your finger, you’re gone. Unless you’re a Hollywood star of course, you remarry.
To meet your someone, you usually have to kiss many frogs. I kissed many and I french kissed 3. The first one is a country frog. The second, a well-built toad. The last one, a city frog. Today, I’m going to tell you a story about the city frog.
~*~
One fine day, a princess met a frog. Frog said, kiss me and I’ll turn into a Prince. So Princess kissed Frog, but nothing happened.
“Why?” she asked Frog. Frog said, “I’m still trying. Changes don’t happen overnight. You just have to trust me.” And so she did.
It was hard for Princess to love Frog at first. Frog is a different species after all. He lives in a pond, she lives in a castle. He is naked most of the time, she wears lace & leather. He sleeps during the day, she sleeps at night. He dives, she sunbaths. And when he prefers to laze & read on his waterlily, she secretly wishes to get more out of life and travel outside the castle.
Slowly but patiently, Princess learned to love Frog for what he is. She started reading and even considered changing her name to Rapunzel. She hoped that Frog would turn into Prince someday, but in his own time. What she hoped more is actually for Frog to love the things she enjoys doing.
However, until today, Frog had only been trying. He couldn’t find a reason to love anything else except for his simple life as a frog.
Princess was very sad. Whenever they discussed about it, it sounded so funny. Nobody got what their conversations were about. All they hear is a human screaming and a frog croaking. They couldn’t understand why the torture; when love is about everything but that.
But Princess never gave up. She tried to live A Frog Life with Frog, and when she couldn’t take it anymore, she cried to her princess friends. When Frog found out about it, he got so angry he turned from a green frog, to a red frog. He loose trust in her, naming her action as “airing dirty laundry”, went home and built himself a membrane cloak. Everytime he sees her princess friends, he wears the cloak.
*
Frog makes a living by catching mosquitoes with his tongue at night while Princess works from 9-6. She looks forward to every Saturdays and Sundays to spend time with her almost Prince, but he never seems as passionate. More than 3/4 of the time, it was Princess who dated Frog. When they argue about this, Frog used the other 1/4 times to prove that he has done his part.
Princess says: Let’s go somewhere this weekend!
Frog replies : I might have work.
Princess says: Let’s celebrate your birthday!
Frog replies : My family might do that too.
Princess says: Let’s hang out tonight!
Frog replies : I might play games with some prawns.
“But… what about me?” she cries.
“That’s very UNFAIR. I DO spend time with you. Why can’t you TRUST me that I’m TRYING to be your Prince?”
The funny thing is, there is nothing left to try, as there is nothing to be changed. Frog will always be a frog and could only always thought that he is still trying to be Prince. As for Princess, she could still live with that, if only that’s the case.
The real case is, how can you make someone want to spend time with you? To want to see you? To want to love you as much as you pour your love to them; instead of him wanting you to be there with him as a bonus to his activities? Cuz that would be the same with forcing somebody to love you.
~*~
Princess is crying as she types this. It is very disappointing to know the one you prioritize, doesn’t prioritize you. I know that feeling, and I believe you once do too.
I miss my frog, and I’m staring at his baby picture. I couldn’t help myself from crying and it is only as simple as that. You cry. You cry. And you cry again until you can’t cry anymore… then you move on. Because you know, he doesn’t even care.
So much for a happy ending. What have we done wrong?
Sometimes, we didn’t do anything wrong. For me, I’ve felt like this countless times as well and that feeling was just awful and horrible. Like, I am so depress and upset and crying and that person knows nothing about it. Then I decided to move on and came up with this theory, if people don’t want to care or bother about us, then we shouldn’t too. We just should leave it as it is and be ourselves ‘cause NO ONE ELSE DOES IT BETTER =)
So what if we’ve met wrong people in our life? Mistakes are portals of discoveries that is. And for me, if I love someone and it’s not returned, I’ll take it as God has a better plan for me and that I’ll meet someone else better and I’m gonna slap and ask myself one day on why did I even fell in love with that person in the very first place.
] and take a photo of myself smiling and yes, every photo of me on my blog will be a HAPPY FACE. And I shall vow that one day if he ever comes back begging for me, I shall just point my finger and laugh at him [Okay, that’s mean =p]
In my opinion, if I am Princess, I shall kick the frog out of my life [it’s hard to do so initially, it will be like stabbing your own heart] and live my Princess life happily! I am a PRINCESS what after all and then since I am a Princess, I shall eat the BEST food, wear the BEST and NICEST clothes, travel around the world [And post up photos on my blog to show the FROG that I’m soooooooo happy without him, YES I WILL JUST BE HAPPY] and I will drive my car [or get a driver HAHAHA!!
And then I shall LIVE BETTER and HAPPIER without the FROG and I shall show the FROG that without him in my life, I am BETTER and HAPPIER because the best revenge is living well
!! And don’t ever, ever drop a Princess status just for a frog la, not worth it. There are so many knights in shining armor in the sea, but we just don’t see it, because we are blinded by the frog.
I’m so sorry if anything in this comment offended you. But everything that I’ve typed here is just from my heart =).
u made me cry & u made me laugh too.. thanks for such a sincere, heart-to-heart comment. i shall read this again when i need to.. & i wish i am as strong as u. )))’:
hey! i sent an e-mail to your gmail
and quote my Physics teacher, LOVE IS A MENTAL TORTURE!!
yes, it is disappointing to know that the one you prioritize doesnt prioritize you. this is one of the reason why i let go the one that i i loved a lot. dun look back but look forward.
look forward. what i wanna do. but feels like a bad force is pulling me backwards.
Time.is.cruel.
See U later. Smile some~
sigh can? )):
i do not know how to comfort others when they are sad. but as i read your entry, i felt that you were really sad but for you to put it all up it means you have a very strong heart/mind to overcome this.
stay strong and healthy..
thanks axiao… will stay healthy. (;
maybe frogs turn into princes only in fairytales.. maybe we should al remember that fairytales only happen in fairytales and nowhere else
if only life was like the frog prince. a true love’s kiss and things will change.
*hugs*
that’s a lesson we all rather not know, kan? haih~
Meeting the wrong frogs in life is in fact a part of life. Everybody has their losses sometime. It always seems that you have found the right frog to be your prince but the truth is it’s still a frog. But put it this way, if you really go on with this frog, will you be happy for the rest of your life waiting for your price?
I hope that you’ll be okay soon. Well, there’s always a better frog out there.
gosh… this is the best true tales ever… i just feel the pain… anyway.. i just learn this.. LOVE URSELF MORE… otherwise.. how do u expect other ppl to love u…(my fren keep saying this to me) so do take care ya.. *but, at this situation.. it’s hard to ask ppl clam down… and again… just cry out loud… and sure… till the point.. u willl wake… and a brand new princess *stronger and happier*
time is the remedy, i guess…
teh o ping lol… cheer up k ? i’ll say if a guy find a girl is right, they will appreciate on who they are, and love who they are. HOHO! im pretty sure u heard similar stuff, but i can assure u it is true cause is happening to me now ;P.
issit! now see; we have a guy speaking here! haha… xD
haha, damn kesian k! the girl dont want me LOL
its like when i thought i was the only one with this problem ,
i found this blog..I can relate to this as i feel we’re
in the same lily pond..
So how? is it not meant to be then?do i let go?do i demand that he try to give me more attention?
i believe, if u really do love someone, u would find a 100 reasons to change; if the change is for the good, why not? that’s my principal. so if he brags about how he loves me but can’t do the least that i can, y bother. right??
[...] September 5, 2009 Here… [...]
the 1st time i saw my ex, i tot he was perfect; handsome,
he plays the organ/guitar, he speaks perfect english etc. and
i tried to overlook the bad things such as how he didn’t give
a damn when i was stranded in town, he never asks me out tht
much and the only time we hang out was his room. and u know
wat, i finally concluded that he’s just not tht into me.
although i tried my best to make him love me as much as i love
him, i tot i deserve someone better -someone that puts more
hard work in the rel, and loves me deeply tht he’s willing
to do anything for me and spend as much time with me bcos he
misses me. so, i hope you’re not with the wrong
toad. “there’s many fishes in the sea”
i guess hor, some guys picked up musical instruments to cheat girls one! i kena once b4. shitass head he sure is!
I came across a saying that goes, “In a lifetime, a girl will meet several wrong guys before she’s destined to meet the guy of her dream.”
I went through almost the same situation like yours in which, I really did try my hardest to live his life, respecting what he loves and stuffs like that. I never asked anything from him exception that wanting him just to spend a little more time with me, that was all.
He was unable to do so but I never grumbled because perhaps I was naive. I’ve always thought, loving somebody is always giving and not getting.
The day when he finally told me, “After a thorough thought, I think I’m not ready for a serious relationship yet,” my world shattered. I cried for 4 hours and it was my birthday.
We dated for quite some time and I even asked him, “Are you sure this is what you want?” He was certain and told me, “I know what I’m doing and this is what I want.”
Like what Samantha mentioned, I treated it as God has a better plan for me and now, I think somehow, I’m really blessed to have His blessings. I found a better job without having to face him as my supervisor. I found more time to spend with my close family and close friends. I found joy in every little thing I’m doing.
All these happen because I’ve gotten rid of his memories in my life. True enough, things like these aren’t easy but as long as you try hard, I know you’ll be able to pull through because Cindy, you’re a bright shining star!
Be strong, girl!
I guess we were 2 naive. if we love someone & could do the same, & he says he loves u too, then y can’t he do more to live our life? sigh~
oh dear, seems like the prettiest princess could also get really hurt. and i thought that princess is an optimistic lady. but as the saying goes, its hard to change a person’s nature/attitude/being, so it more likely that we have to accept it or leave it.
but if we decided to take it, then there’s certain things that we have to do which includes toughen up our heart and adapting to the ones we love. but if 2 person were to date each other, tolorence and patience are the main key. i can’t say i have them all as i suck in dealing with relationship, but really, the fact that love hurts and we have to bear with it would take up most of our love life time.
it is sad but true; your last sentence. i wonder y i even started ‘it’ when we’re just different. it shouldn’t be this way, right? he’s prolly just the wrong one…
only time..
Its hard when the other party doesn’t appreciate you for who u are. I had a similar experience too last year and at 1st it didn’t sink in cos of exams. But when the dust settled and when i thought about it, it did hurt. In my mind, i just thought to myself that there’s no point going through this cos it has passed.
Unfortunately there isn’t a magic pill that shrinks people and enables them to enter their partner’s brain to change their behaviour. So at the present time, painful as it is, u gotta be strong and move on. You’re young….plenty of fishes out in the sea.
Go to the gym…work out…work out till u drop. Time and a positive outlook WILL heal things. Take care.
tried the gym b4 when this kinda shit happened last time. it feels good i agree. but i’m in no mood 2 do nethin this time really. or it feels like that. something like that.
Hi Cindy,
I think it’s really not appropriate to post your relationship
problem in your blog.Well, maybe for you…this is a place
to vent your emotions and all but think about it, how does one
feels (referring to your frog) if he reads this?
Be a grown up lady and settle personally.Relationship is
something really funny.Patience is the remedy and bearing
in mind that, no one is perfect (including you and me.If you
really love someone, you have to accept who he is and using
the princess and frog theory is something really childish
here.
Thus,personally I feel you shouldn’t even wrote this blog
to tell the entire world.Confront your frog in a good manner.
Comprise. Communicate.
hrmm. r u his friend?
No worries girl.just express anything u like…so long as u feel relieved then it will be good for u.. i hope the frog will change for u kays.. cheers !
if he reads this, good! at least he`ll know how much he has hurt her…
btw, i don`t think it`s childish. well written ^^
there’re still many frogs out there
don’t give up and keep on kissing.
one will eventually poof into your real prince
KEEP ON KISSING YO~!!! u too jay see!
dear princess, that city frog of yours is an ass and he does
not deserve you at all. not one itty bitty bit you hear?
trust me when i say that he is not worth your tears and you’d
find your true prince someday who will love and treasure you.
so hold your head up high, wipe off your tears and show city
frog that in the end, boyfriend or not, it is he who ends up
being a ‘bonus’ to *your* everyday activities
his fairytale ended at that and never again will he enjoy a
beautiful and kind princess by his side.
as for you? well, your fairytale is just the beginning! and
i’m sure, like every other princess out there, you’d have
your happy ending!
so take care and all the best! (^U^)
i like u already. haha! ;P
Not everyone is meant to be blessed to be the prince of your dreams, mostly because of their heart. Sometimes what they prioritize is just by having you by their side and not needing your love to complete them. Those who are true with their feelings will cherish you’re love and that’s when you’ll realize that the frog is already the prince, princess. =)
isn’t that selfish? sigh~
Cindy, I used to be in your situation too. Trying hard to live in his life, instead both of us going thru the path together holding hand together gather.
I used to have some thoughts to let go, but our long relationship make me stay and try to suit him. He got no time for me, his time was filled by his work and family. I always think “who am I to him?”
I used to be so stubborn demanding him to suit my life, I like outing, I like enjoyment, I like to fill my time with him. But ended up we argune more than eating rice.
However, if you think you still love this city frog (just like me), how about try to be what he want (for now). Let him feel your changes, if he can figure out that you still the one he want, he can change without you asking him too.
I’m not at his side, but I understand you still want to be with him, but just dunno how, while everybody asking you to ends it. So, let’s try the other way. Let’s see it works.
Take care~
how bout u? r u still trying? *hugs*
Yes, Im still trying…
Too hard to let go this long relationship, trying hard to suit him, and hopefully, he knew what i’m trying to do ….”TO SAVE OUR RELATIONSHIP”
This blog explains exactly what I’m feeling now too.
I have yet to find any solution for it though.
I have not moved on either. Stil in the crying process.
It is a screw up feeling…all you can do, is pray hard it goes away soon.
i don’t know what to say… i’m here with u, & if u read these comments, many people r here with us… ^^
r u still with him? y r u crying?? don’t liao… i’m here with u..
No, I’m not with him anymore..since 3 weeks ago.
I am still crying..because I keep asking myself, should I have held on longer? Should I have tried harder?
But deep down inside, I know it’s no use.
The last night, I was begging, and pleading over the phone.
And I know, when a girl need to go to the extend of pleading, there is no point of staying in the realationship anymore. Just like what my bestfriend kept asking me, “why must you ask him for good morning msges? It should come from him because he wants to. Why must you insist on a proper date? He should do it, cause he wants to. Why must you keep crying for him to spend time with you? He should do it, because he wants to see you happy. Why are you being so pathetic? Can you have some dignity please, and stop begging????!! Why are you complaining and crying when you refuse to leave him? If you choose to jump out from a window, you’ll feel the pain. Yes. And that is what you choose to do. So, live with it, and stop calling people and crying, and let me waste my time talking to you, when you don’t get anything into your head.”
Dear Gorgeous,
If you can cook as Good as your mum, I could be your frog!
ALA… NGELAT! hahaha~
then I would change from spiderman to frogman!!
I feel the same as you. I love my bf alot, but then he put his family way ahead first. My mom objected him as my bf but i never give up. I still wanna be with him. Soon his parents dislike me too cus according to them, i am not good enough. But deep down inside, both of us love each other dearly. There is so many restrictions and objections around us. I do not care about them but sadly, my bf does. He listen to his family and acted cold towards me. He ask me to give him time to settle…and till now i am still waiting for my prince to come back to me. Crying everynight missing him and longing to spend time with him which i never gets to. But i am not giving up on love. No matter how many people are saying we are wrong to be together, the love between us will not vanish. So have faith in yourself. Maybe i am just saying this to comfort myself. Do not give up on love. Cherish the memories together, at least you had the chance to be together.
Google the lyrics for “How deep is your love”! Got one sentence for this situation i jumpa liao..
and also the song “Be with you” by Akon! So how are you feeling now? better?
princess love frog because he is a frog. if he turns to a prince, princess will find another frog trying to change him to prince. if the frog doesn’t change to prince, princess will be upset because she is hoping for from to become prince.
sigh… life is complicated
gisss…love how the way u write this into that :p
seems like alot of princesses are still suffering or was suffered in of meeting the frog…well I guess princesses mmg ‘fan zian’ wan,got real prince dun wan, end up wan to be with the frog, although we know the frog will one day turn into prince but actually 1 thing we didnt notice is that he’s still a frog, and princesses will still be princesses.
end up…happy ending will happen or not? we dont know. princesses will at last choose the prince or the frog, we also dont know. but 1 sentence really useful for me is that ‘God decides who enter our life, but we are the one to decide who will leave our life’
at the end of the day, everything just come and go, relationship are just 1 part of feeling in our life. cheer up gal
you know, a frog may be someone else’s prince; just as a girl, may not be a princess in everyone elses eyes.
I’m just saying, what is positive or negative in your eyes may just be the opposite in someone elses eyes.
And to love, is to accept a person for who he is.
If you found the frog has too many flaws for you, maybe he is just not the right one for you. Have you considered that?
Relationship is always built on care and acceptance, if you can’t accept, and he can’t care… well, maybe you are just not meant to be.
Try to be honest with each other, and talk it out with patience.
Even if he is not your “prince” i’m sure he is to a certain defree someone very special to you, since its not that easy to have a relationship with a person out of 6 billion ppl in this world right?
vanilla86..do u have a blog?
noooo… why? i can see your blog name also got vanilla hor?
hehe, i just like vanilla icecream laaa…
haha…ya…coz I saw u put 86…same yr, then vanilla..I very sensitive tto vanilla :p pai seh
Sorry to break the news but he’s just not that into you. Its
time to move on, you are such a great gal and I’m pretty sure you
will be able to find a guy who deserves you. I know it’s
easier to say than be done, but then you would not like to
waste your time to be hurt. Wish you will find your true
happiness. cheers
cha boh..you always paint a happy character in your blog, i understand how it feels, especially the 1 you prioritize put u in the waiting list is quite torturing..
what i can say is, just look forward, there are always a better frog which you will definately find 1 in the future..but as for now, stay happy and live your life to the fullest.. the thing that i learn from my gal friends, show them that you can life even better without them…:)
simply said, you deserve better.
and this may sound cliché, but we’re still young. you’re not even 23 yet, right?
familiarity breeds liking (and more), so spending some amount of time with anyone who managed to get our attention (sparks!) at the beginning will be enough to draw you in. but sparks always fade, and sometimes that’s when the true colours appear.
but true love in the long run comes from being on a similar path together. knowing that you are headed in the same direction in life. and having lots to share along the way.
if you can’t stand his ways now, it’ll only get worse over time.
and you’re right. i would want to be with someone who really wants to spend time with me without being asked. if not, kira tepuk sebelah tangan d lah. and nobody enjoys that feeling.
i think i know how u feel. take care Scorpio.
Kudos to you for taking a stand.
Sometimes we have to be selfish to do what’s right by you.
It’s all very nice to say that love is all forgiving, giving, eternal and blabla.. but at the end of the day, it boils down to you.
You being happy, you doing what’s right for yourself.
He doesn’t sound like much of a specimen. He probably does have redeeming qualities but that’s not the point.
Problem with girls are they expect the person they are with to change whereas guys expect the girls not to change.
That’s essentially the fundamental flaw/difference in our thinkings.
We don’t change. We may try. We are the rule rather than the exception. Better luck with the next.
go bang wall, reply everybody except me wtf!
tomolo dinner u belanja!
Dear Eri,she knows you are neither frog and nor prince, so no hurry lar. but at least i reply u
nah; REPLAI! haiyah see u everyday!!
i know how that feels… he treated me like a princess at first, but after being together for almost 8 months, we went out less and less, the phonecalls came only once in few days.. i tried everything to bring that spark back again but i guess when a person stops loving you, no matter how hard you try, it`s no use.
even when he pushed me away, i kept going back. i used to ask myself it was somethin i did or didn`t do that made him turn so cold but i finally realized that he just didn`t love me.
it hurt a lot to walk away and not look back and it took me a long time to stand up again but at the end of the day, it was worth it cause why should we make someone a priority when all we`re ever gona be is an option to them?
we don`t deserve this. if they can`t appreciate and love us, it`s their loss
well…sorry but i have to be a bit more direct on the comment,
so “hey Cindy, dont look back in anger or drown urself in
self-pity…move on…coz in life, there’s always obstacle to
be faced every now and then”.
stimes its better to be direct. no need twists & turns.
There’s 2 situations I see here.
1. You still love him and want to save the relationship
Probably confrontation is the only way out. Try to communicate, find things that both of you could do together. If he is willing to try, draft out plans on how both of you would go on solving this problem. A relationship is only a relationship when both parties compromise and tolerate.
2. You love him but you think its time to be done with it
Time is the only remedy. I would say concentrate on other things like work or gym, but I know how it feels like not wanting to do ANYTHING at all. Pour your heart out if you feel like it, get drunk with some girlfriends if it makes you feel better. And when you DO jump out of the circle, you’ll see that its worthless and have a good laugh.
Good luck girl
hi cindy, reading this post made me sad, yet, somehow, things didn’t seem so bad anymore because i don’t feel alone in this anymore. I guess every girl has her frog. I have only had 1 frog, and my story is pretty much like yours except that my prince revealed his true frog form after almost 5 years and right after discussing our future. I felt cheated and used because I never got a reason for the sudden transformation. I’m still dealing with the pain because my frog told me, “if it’s meant to be it’ll be.” we still keep in contact. I guess, girls like us end up loving the frog simply for what it is, a frog. I’m hopeful though, because everything happens for a reason and maybe we are princesses for a reason too, that we will eventually one day be found by our princes. If you have to cry, cry; but know that it’s going to be okay *hugs*
much love,
a hopeful princess
i don’t know what 2 say anymore. i just regretted. )=
there are many frogs in the pond.. =)
I have given my true love to someone before and I have received something similar before. Yours doesn’t sound ‘real” to me. When u have doubt, move on as anyone who really cares about his/her real love wouldn’t want to see him/her cries! Btw, happy birthday to ypo cindy! You have to be happry and thankful tat its your birthday, and and feel the same the same with everyday too!
All the best & take care!
I was a giver as well as a receiver of a great true love before. If the love is genuinely “real”, seeing each other in tears is the last we wanna see! I don’t see that in yours, not sure how ‘real” it is! Move on if you need to, let the frog go and he’ll be happier with the toad!
Cheer up and happy birthday, or rather you should be happy everyday!
A frog is a…. frog. Shouldn’t have tried changing him in the first place. Just try to remember that in future and you would be so much happier. Cheers.
this post made me sad because i have been kissing alot of frogs and end up with nothing in the end.
i always believe dat when u love someone, you will change for the other person just to make them happy. but this has to be both ways. it will not work only one a one way street.
seems to me this frog is a bad frog.should make frog porridge.
a princess will always be a princess and there will always be a prince for every princes. we get what we deserve and those that come by will need to either be a prince or be a good frog. if the frog really shows that he wants to be a prince, i don’t mind living like a frog even.
be strong! you’re better off with a prince anyway
honestly, this is THE comment i love MOST after blogging for 5 years now. loves it; do comment more. ^^
why leh??
u must learn some kung fu…..then the frog love u
deep deep…..simple as that….
Why? True love is the result from the effort of two person, not just one – you! Love yourself before you can love others, and forgive yourself if you want to forgive others.
sigh~ u teach us kung fu la!